"Authoritative Parenting Style, what is it and how does it affect your child?"

Parenting is a unique journey, and there are multiple ways to approach it. Today I will focus on one of the approaches that's been widely studied — the authoritative parenting style. 

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In this article, I'll be exploring the characteristics of authoritative parenting, its impact on children or how it influences your child’s development.

As well as the pros and cons of this style of parenting, and its advantages to the child. 

So, if you're intrigued by this style of parenting and want to learn more about it, you're in the right place.

“Keep reading as I break down the characteristics of the authoritative parenting style.”

Let's dive into its key characteristics. 


1.  Authoritative parents create clear boundaries: They set rules and guidelines that their children need to follow.

But unlike authoritarian parents, they explain the reasoning behind these rules. This is not a "because I said so" regime.

This open dialogue promotes understanding and respect between parent and child. 

2.   They are assertive yet, they are not intrusive. They maintain a healthy balance between asserting their authority and respecting their child's independence.

They set expectations and express their demands clearly, but they also consider their child's individuality and personal space. It's like being a coach rather than a dictator. 

3.  They encourage independence. They understand that their role is to prepare their children for the world, not shelter them from it.

They provide the guidance and support their children need to develop their own skills and make their own decisions.

This helps the child to grow into a confident and self-reliant adult. 

4.  Authoritative parents develop a warm and nurturing relationship with their children.

They show love and affection, provide support and encouragement, and celebrate their children's achievements. 

They strive to create a positive and loving environment where their child feels safe and secure. They listen to their children's thoughts, feelings, and concerns.

They value their child's perspective and consider it when making decisions. This shows the child that they are valued and that their voice matters.

These characteristics combine to create a parenting style that is firm but flexible, assertive but respectful, and supportive but not overbearing.

The authoritative parenting style respects the child's individuality while providing the structure and guidance they need to grow and thrive. 

"From these characteristics, you can already see the potential impact on children, right? But let's dig deeper.”

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"How Does an Authoritative Parenting Style Affect Your Child's Development?"

It's clear that the effects of authoritative parenting on children are quite profound. It's like planting a seed in fertile soil and providing it with the right amount of sunlight, water, and nutrients. 

What's the Possible Result? 

A thriving, healthy plant. Similarly, children under an authoritative parenting style often blossom into happy, capable, and successful individuals. Let’s break it down with a couple of examples:

Authoritative Parenting Style Example: 

*     Picture a child who feels valued and heard. This child is likely to develop a strong sense of self-esteem, knowing they have a safe space to voice their thoughts and concerns. 

Authoritative parents support this type of environment by engaging in open communication, acknowledging their child's perspective, and providing guidance when needed. 

*.   Imagine a child who's encouraged to solve problems independently. This child is likely to become a confident decision-maker, unafraid to tackle challenges head-on. 

An authoritative parenting style helps improve this skill by setting clear expectations and consequences, but also allowing their child to experience the natural outcomes of their actions. 

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They guide without being controlling and teach without preaching. Consider a child who's taught to manage their emotions effectively. This child is likely to develop strong emotional intelligence, understanding not only their feelings but also those of others. 

Authoritative parents model emotional guidance, demonstrating how to react to situations in a balanced, thoughtful manner. 

*   But it's not all sunshine and rainbows you know. Authoritative parenting styles require a delicate balance between setting boundaries and encouraging independence. 

It demands patience, persistence, and a lot of emotional investment. Yet, the reward is a child who's emotionally resilient, socially adept, and academically successful. 

In essence, authoritative parenting plants seeds of independence, responsibility and empathy in a child.

The result is a well-rounded individual, equipped with the tools to navigate life's challenges and triumphs. Clearly, the impact of authoritative parenting is significant.

Pros of Being a Authoritative Parent:

Warmth and Support:

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Authoritative parents are known for their warmth, empathy, and emotional support.

They create a nurturing environment where children feel loved, valued, and understood.

Clear Expectations: They always set clear and reasonable expectations for their children's behaviour, fostering a sense of structure and consistency in the family.

Open Communication: They will encourage open communication and dialogue with their children, allowing for mutual respect, understanding, and trust to flourish.

Independence and Responsibility: Authoritative parenting promotes independence and responsibility in children by offering guidance and support.

At the same time allowing their children to make age-appropriate decisions and learn from their experiences.

Cons of Being an Authoritative Parent:

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Time and Effort: Implementing authoritative parenting requires time, effort, and commitment from parents.

All necessary to maintain consistency, provide emotional support, and engage in meaningful communication with their children.

Balancing Warmth and Discipline: This means finding the right balance between warmth and discipline.

It can be challenging for authoritative parents, as they strive to be both nurturing and firm in their approach.

Potential Conflicts: Authoritative parents may encounter conflicts with their children when expectations are not met or when boundaries are challenged.

Managing these conflicts requires patience, negotiation, and problem-solving skills.

Cultural and Contextual Differences: The effectiveness of authoritative parenting may vary across different cultural and environmental conditions, as cultural norms and societal factors influence parenting practices and child-rearing beliefs.

"So, is Authoritative Parenting the Best?" 

Overall, authoritative parenting is all about a balance between warmth, responsiveness and support. It's about setting clear boundaries, but also about encouraging independence and self-expression. 

As an authoritative parent you should have open lines of communication with your child, listening to their thoughts and concerns while strengthening the parent-child bond and promoting trust, respect, and understanding.

You should help them to develop healthy coping strategies and problem-solving skills. You need to encourage academic achievement and psychological well-being.

You should guide them to be self-reliant, resilient, and capable of forming healthy relationships.

In the end, you will likely get a well rounded, healthy, happy, respectful child. 

But to answer the question, is Authoritative Parenting the best? humm, not sure, I used it along with some of the sub-types. Each parent or couple must make their own decision. 

I am not about to tell anyone how to raise their children, I just want to offer the best information that I can, to help you to make an informed decision. 

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The advantages - How the Child Feels? 

Well, children raised under this style of parenting tend to be happier, more confident, and better equipped to handle life's challenges.

They know their parents believe in them, which boosts their self-esteem. They're also more likely to build healthy relationships based on respect and empathy. 

But remember, it’s not all roses and rainbows. The challenges of authoritative parenting include finding that sweet spot between being too lenient and too strict. It requires patience, consistency, and open communication. 

Also, keep in mind, that all children are unique, what works for one child may not work for another.

"Remember, there's no one-size-fits-all in parenting. However, understanding different parenting styles can help you find the best approach for you and your child.

Eg. One boy who came into my care was 14, he had lived with the same foster parents for the past 7 years. They had decided to retire.

This boy had never been to the movies, he had never been to a school dance or any extra curricular activities. He was not allowed to go out with friends. He had to just stay home most of the time and pretty much do nothing.

He didn't talk much and was quite withdrawn. 

My point: I was a permissive parent with him. I let him go places, he went to his first school dance, played on the soccer team in town, joined activities at the boys and girls club.

He made lots of friends, went to the movies, got a girlfriend and I got him a cell phone and laptop .....

He still had rules and boundaries, he had to attend therapy which was over an hour away so we had lots of time to discuss life and his hopes and dreams. 

By the time he was 16, he was adopted by a wonderful couple. Not many teenagers get adopted because they are too old and often have developed some unwanted behaviours.

Although he had a very mild diagnoses of autism, the last time I spoke to him, his new parents had put him through community college and he was on the football team there. 

So, you do you, do what is the best for your child, no matter what anyone else says, unless it is what you want.